[學生習作A]
My hobby is read books①。When I was seven years old.I became interested in reading books.I like needing books because there are a lot of useful things in books.I can learn a lot of knowledge from books. Books also② can teach me how to be a good s even can solve many problems for me.I will read more good books to improve myself.
①改為reading books，動詞作表語時應該用動名詞。
②also的位置應放在can之後。
[點評]：檔次9-11分。
①要點不全，漏掉最後一個要點。
②句子基本無誤，能正確傳遞資訊給讀者但文章不流暢，句子與句子之間過渡不自然，給讀者感覺在回答上述問題。
③有少量錯誤。
[學生習作B]
My hobby is ing books is very I was young ，my mother used to tell me a story before.I went to bed every stories were so interesting that I always felt they weren’t I began to read books by le by little I became interested in reading.I can learn much knowledge and many interesting things all over the I read books，I can enjoy the beautiful the same time I can improve my writing.I want to be a writer in the future，so I must study hard and read more books so that my dream can come true.
①開門見山、點題。
②真情流露，理由充分。
③文中帶圈的連詞使用得恰當，使文章過渡自然、
④巧妙使用句型以表決心。
[點評]：檔次13-14分。
①清楚表達寫作目的，要點齊全。
②語言表達靈活多樣，字裡行間流露出真情實感，文章有感染力。
③恰當使用連詞和從句，語言流暢，且無錯誤，是一篇高質量的作文。